Message to a Boy

Dearest Alex,
I am getting nervous about the upcoming semester. There has been so much going on this summer that I don't know how I will be when I get back into the grind of school. I think it will either be really good for me or it will just compound things even more and make it all come tumbling down.

Gah, being without you for 3 months has been really difficult. I am not talking physically -I mean, yes, of course being so far away from your touch was hard, but it was just hard not being able to smile at you every day or watch the way you walk as we leave the cafeteria (you usually leave with Elgin or someone and I stop by the admin building and simply enjoy watching the way your hips move in such a masculine swagger.

I want to be close to you emotionally, with my heart. I feel like I lost so much of that this summer. With our hormones, we lost nothing physically =P, but I feel like we have so much to catch up on. Just catching up on lost quality time spent together. Evenings in the SC, seeing each other between classes at CPO. Do you know what i mean?

Maybe I feel this way just because of the "War" that I have been through this summer. Maybe you don't feel a loss over anything at all. I just wanted you to know. I so badly just want to steal those few minutes together. It's the small things around campus that I want; eating in the cafeteria and hanging out till an hour after it closes, meeting in the caf lobby before getting in the car for church, sitting on the benches on the green after dark, studying/sitting in the library together.

Love,
Amy



P.S.
When I get married, I want to make love with the light on, not off. I just watched a scene in In Her Shoes where the couple starts making out and the girl turns the light off, but the guy turns it on again, then the girl turns it off for a second time, but the guy turns in on, demanding that he be able to see her because he believes that she is beautiful and he wants her to know that.