I cook and play tag for $

I am so blessed: I am sitting with some of the sweetest kids, putting together a giant puzzle, listening to Christmas music and drinking homemade hot cocoa after enjoying from-scratch biscuits and chicken pot pie.

Of course, it was a bit crazy figuring out what to make this morning when I walked in the house and was told, "there is chicken and ground beef and we have some pasta sauce that we opened up last night, could you make something for dinner?" I looked in the fridge and there were slimy carrots, limp celery stalks, and a half rotten onion, but, thank goodness, there was BUTTER =). I decided to try to use all the icky vegetables up before they became completely inedible and chicken pot pie is what I came up with.

Btw, I am so excited to make stuffed peppers on Thursday. The green peppers have been sitting there for two weeks now and are about to die too.

Alone in the Caf

I'm sick of eating alone. I eat meals alone more than I eat with ppl and it's really depressing to do in a cafeteria. My friends either don't eat in the caf or dont have the same meal times as me or leave campus every weekend. I ask to sit witth ppl, but they always have a meeting with somene over lunch or are having a "lunch date" with a friend.

Also, my roomie says that I am melancholy and have been for the past two weeks or so. It has also been that the past two weeks have been really hard with Ed. Everyday I have been tempted with, "you could just skip a meal or a snack today" or "why don't you just go for a second run?" or "your stomach is getting a pooch." Blah! I hate the lies, the temptations, the seductive quality of slavery to the ideal and perfect image.

The counselors and professionals tell me that Ed gets worse when I am stressed, so I assume I am very stressed, as I have not been attacked like this in months. With my sister being up and down and on medications and getting a new diagnosis every week for her mental instability, my dad dating this new woman and looking for new jobs, and my mom dating Ernie kind of and all, I guess it makes sense, especially when you add in my graduation in December, grad school/jobs, moving in with my boss, and having half of my school getting engaged.