Taryn threw me a graduation party last night at her house. It was really fun. Vince, Cayla, Alec, John, Senny, Allison, Erica, Jeff, Ben and Matt Travers, Chris and Chris, Steve, Kristin Beck, Amara, and a few others came. Most of the time we sat out on Taryn's dock, talked, and fought over the hammock -I have a bruise on my elbow from falling out of it.
My mom tried to keep the "surprise" party a secret, but she accidentally told me about it Thursday night (she said, "I've just been so stressed; your dad's new job, me losing my job, your sister's musical rehearsals, your party tomorrow night, graduation on Monday..."). I hadn't known about my party before that. She started freaking out and listing what was stressing her during intermission at the Bob Carr when we saw Camelot. My sister called mom my mom cus she needed ride about 10 minutes int the second act and so my mom left to get her. I'm sure it looked very funny to the people sitting next to my mom and I: a mother flipping out on her irritated teenage daughter, then leaving the theater 10 minutes later and not returning at all. It looked as if I'd been abandoned over some silly argument.
Steve invited me over to his house after the party and I had this weird feeling that I shouldn't go, but I went anyway. Nothing happened, we sat on his couch and he gave me a massage and asked each other questions back and forth (sometimes silly questions, sometimes serious questions). He eventually asked if I'd ever been kissed and he was baffled by the fact that I'd never been kissed (it is kind of weird that I have literally -not figuratively!- slept with guy in his bed but have never been kissed, I guess). Apparently Steve has made out with 4 or 5 girls and was confused how I had gotten through high school and never been kissed. Oh well. Nothing happened, though I guess my bad premonition that told me not go has let me know that I no longer want to hang out with guys alone so late at night. Though I had a nice, safe time with Steve last night, I don't think I will be doing anything like that from now on, it's just not pure and does not look innocent and could too easily turn into something bad.
Tonight I am going to my little sisters' show. She's in Seussical and is a bird girl - I am so proud of her, I love her. I think she is the one thing that makes me hesitate about going to college early; I don't want to leave her alone, I am scared she will get into trouble or start dating the wrong kind of boys. Though, if she has the same kind of luck I do with guys, she won't be dating any of them for a loooong time (made it through high school without ever having a boyfriend or a date.
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